howling2lamoon

I wanted.

I wanted to.

I wanted.

I wanted to say

What I couldn’t say that time before

That time and the other time and the time before that…

Can, you hear my heart beat out my chest? No?

That’s okay ‘cause I’m just about done with this.

Don’t feel bad because I’m not somethin you’d miss.

Anyway I’d just wanted to let you know

I just wanted to have this show

That there. Is some form of good in me yet to be seen.

Hid away inside my mind, purposely drove

I(oh..)

I wanted to say something more, but I forgot.

My head! Its stuck inside somethin of a infinite like lot.

I’m driving round in circles with no wheels or ski’s

But don’t mind me I’m just ramblin’g

So cut! This picture. Its breaking me apart because I have , no clue

What I’m trying to say to you. Its this. Miss.

Without you, I’d die. Drop to your recently cleaned floor like a fruit fly

Like a dislodged eye, something of a refused sandwhich. On rye.

Oh~

What I’d really like to say. Is this.

Miss.
....................

I’m not even sure how I feel.

Miss meal. In reality. You buy realty.

Yet in the end I just discuss its fealty, not what love can bring but , hate. And debate.

Do you get me?

Do you understand me?

My unbreakable nails are chipped on your hardwood floor.

Similar to a scene in which stars a whore.

‘Cept I don’t have on black eyeliner and running mascara.

Should I?

God, why can’t I stick to one topic.

I’ll profit. One day from the incessant ramblin’gs of mine.

Of mine~

Intellectual Decline~

It’s happening. NOW!

POW! Hyperbole and other grammatical categorizations.

Relations. That’s what this is all about.

Miss.

Miss Mouth.

I’d like to kiss it.

Is this it?

Is this it?

I(oh)

I wanted

I wanted to

Punch right through and say something to you
....................

But miss, my breath is wasted on words amiss

Such bliss, comes not from what I can tell you but what I can show

Using verbal commands

Blessings not reprimands

And we’ll join in band

Like a War-won commando

So I’ll pull out my banjo

Pull out my bass

You try on that dress and you put on your face.

And I’ll say

Miss

Miss…

Is there something amiss?

Do. ~/-

Do you see something wrong with me?

No?

Then why is it that you havent kissed me yet(I mean),

Why is it you haven’t loved me to death(I mean)

Why is it you haven’t touched my face(I mean)

(Really)

This

Miss

Is why we simply can’t be together, forever.

I’m denied a happily ever after.

Ever after.
....................

Forever After.

And the after after that ever after.

And you.

Miss.

Can seek the bliss that I have to leave behind.

So.

Take this kiss and turn away, leave me blind

Miss.

Walk away so I can please stop talking

Please.

My voice dies as you grace into the trees

Hiss.

From my mouth as I curl in this clearing

I don’t know what I’m hearing

Sound escapes from mouth! But I do not hear it from my ears.

But in my brain. I am insane AND!!

(you)Miss.

Are free from me forever…and ever…and after…and never…thereafter…hereafter

Perception at once shapes the Mind and rules over Time.
Time erodes human Perception and then in turn warps the Mind.
The Mind is capricious having various effects on Perception, Time and the Mind itself...with harmony, progress is made.

In the face of change
that's when she turned to me and said,
"i'm not sure anymore..."

so tell me now
if this ain't love then how do we get out?
because I don't know
that's when she said I don't hate you boy
I just want to save you while there's still something left to save
that's when I told her I love you girl
but I'm not the answer to the questions that you still have

Somewhere between happy, and total fucking wreck
Feet sometimes on solid ground, sometimes at the edge
To spend your waking moments, simply killing time
Is to give up on your hopes and dreams, to give up on your...

Life for you, (who we are) has been less than kind
So take a number, (who we are) stand in line
We've all been sorry, (who we are) we've all been hurt
But how we survive, (who we are) is what makes us who we are

An obvious disinterest, a barely managed smile
A deep nod in agreement, a status quo exile
I shirk my obligations, I miss all your deadlines
I excel at quitting early, and fucking up my life

Life for you, (who we are) has been less than kind
So take a number, (who we are) stand in line
We've all been sorry, (who we are) we've all been hurt
But how we survive, (who we are) is what makes us who we are

All smiles and sunshine, a perfect world on a perfect day
Everything always works out, I have never felt so fucking great
All smiles and sunshine, a perfect world on a perfect day
Everything always works out, I have never felt so great!

All because of you,
I haven’t slept in so long.
When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean,
Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down,
I’ll follow your voice,
All you have to do is shout it out.

All because of you,
I believe in angels.
Not the kind with wings,
No, not the kind with halos,
The kind that bring you home,
When home becomes a strange place.
I’ll follow your voice,
All you have to do is shout it out.

Can the rain fall lighter then this?
A tiny drizzle from the heavans, slides down our skin.
And I'll say ours because its almost like were the same person.
Will I walk into this pole, my dear?
I only ask because I stare at your eyes constantly.
You only laugh as impact happens, but its not to make fun.
You call me cute and we continue to walk under our cities' beautifully watching eyes.
Two beautiful rods tickling the sky ever so gently with flashing red lights.
I wonder if this is why the sky is letting down a happy hydro haunting.
The only thing I find daunting, at this very moment, is that this can end at any time.
My head is so full of thought right now, yet you only bite your lip and smile while you bring the cuff of your sleeve to your mouth.
This hides your wonderfully perfect lips, to show your wonderfully perfect and warm eyes.
These beautiful brown eyes exude every bit of wonderfully perfect love that I feel every time I peer into them.
Its so much that sometimes I have to look away.
And baby, thats a sin to me.
So now I'll ask you, will you take a ride with me?
And maybe this time, this will be the ride of your life.
And maybe next time, it will be the flight of your life.
Right now, without any doubt, I will take you into this enchanting garden.
Under this calming reflectual gate. It reflects the clouds, and were flying, just you and me.
I don't need to hold your hand as I take you onto this great lawn that is as acoustic as your guitar, because, were so connected.
Can I pick you up? This question is rhetorical as you soon find out.
But I guess gravity had other plans as it takes us down, ever so down. Yet I'm up again as I find gravity's plans fall in with my own.
Now we lay, head to head, as the cold air meshes over our face to produce warm.
Yet no lips need to comfort the other pair.
The wind and moment do that for us as the fountain a little ways off sprays jet streamed light into the air.....
Us without a care......

Cool like the ocean
A clean execution
The grainy sand digs in between the cuts and lacerations in my feet
But a chilled wind pushes itself in my face so that I cannot feel for seconds at a time
When you have cold steel in your hands, blood and sand in your feet and gentle winds on your face
a sensory overload is common.

Cool by the ocean
His face now conforms to its new master, the ocean of sand
An idea passes through my head, I wonder if I should leave him in his new home in the sand
or move him to the body of water before us...me...if he were still alive then it would be us
A gurgling and slight squirm drives itself into the corner of my eye
It seems its still us
As the tide recedes, so does this man's life.
They say it gets easier if you start calling them "it's".
I think, that I wouldn't be a man killer if I called them "it's"
This man had a wife and child.
His name was Robert Paulson.


Or Henry Williams.
Something stupid.


And the pain hits my foot again.
I contemplate for a moment whether to go to my car or stay here on the beach
with this man. This dead man.
Its not a very hard decision.
Just a few minutes ago I injected him with BDG.
Biologically Dissolvable Gasoline. And thats only the street name for this shit.
Some new concoction some scientist made when he found out studying animals wasnt gonna pay the bills.
What this cute injection does is it turns whatever it has been injected into a living helium tank.
Yes....boom.
I tense myself up for probably one of the most sadistic hits i've ever taken.
After I wince all the way to the sidewalk i light a cigarette, because I know I have to.
And I send this guy off with a bang.
Literally.
Fine, it was more of a boom.

These voices shout. They bang on the doors that reside inside my dome.
My inner sanctum. Where I can be myself and myself alone.
Thoughts that can cause damage to the outside world are merely a whimper here.
But these voices, they intrude. They rape my mind with thoughts of rape and murder and robbery.
They come in the dark and the light.
My void and sentry.
Doctors tell me im crazy, but i know im crazy.
Why wouldnt I know im crazy if im blatantly crazy. I seriously dont need doctor who obviously sees that im crazy, and sees that i know im obviously crazy to tell me im obviously crazy.
First hes a man, then hes a dragon, then hes a giraffe. I can laugh because im so amazingly crazy and horribly dementialized that sooner or later I just wont care anymore. I just can't care anymore.
So I'll keep doin what I do.
I'll feed ATM machines cats'. Or whatever it is crazy people do.

Then I wake up to an alarm.
I look to the right of me and there is my apparent wife of 10 apparent years.
I slide out of bed, and I rush to the bathroom. Streaming piss into a toilet seems to be the only thing that matters, and I hope I can talk to that dragon giraffe thing.
I brush my teeth and fix myself something to eat.
On the way to work I pick up a red eye.
I don't even read it. I just like the way it makes me look to other people. Simply because they like the way it looks.
I head into work. Not soon after that do I feel the need to regurgitate everything in my stomach, even the things not there, and the things that have never been there.
I look into the mirror, and then I see the doctor.
"Sir you are crazy"
"Yes.......yes I am."

Normalcy....it's laughable at best.

I'm just gonna post a few of my writes.
Cause that's pretty much all I do's.
But yeah Lets hope ya like some of em.